Changes

Yesterday my husband got the job that he had recently interviewed for about oh, a gazillion times. After nearly three weeks of interviews, competency tests, and drug screens he finally got the call that they wanted him to start...immediately. He came home early from his current job, had a bite to eat, and then headed out. We assumed he would be home rather early since he was just going to fill out paperwork and do some training, but early came and went, then midnight came and went, and finally I got a call around 12:45am that he was on the route home. It was a long and tiring day but it's a new day and it has to be done all over again.

I really am excited that he has gotten another job and is trying to get out from underneath his family business but this is going to be really difficult for our little family. With him not being home but maybe an hour or so a day I know Tristyn is going to be affected greatly. She has already started being clingy (textbook sign that something is wrong with her) and throwing tantrums for me to hold her. When I do pick her up she hugs me as hard as she can and pats my back like she is saying "please don't leave me Mama, I just don't understand where Dada is". It breaks my heart. I know she already misses him and I know it is only going to get worse.

Last night was my first time home alone all day and night in a long time. My first time by myself knowing that this was the first of many. It was awkward in the sense that I didn't have anyone to call and tell him I was going to town, or check in to make sure he didn't need something from the store. It was even more odd that I did not have to be home to take care of supper and clean the house before he got home. It was a feeling like being single again and it is a feeling that I particularly do not care for. I am sure that just like Tristyn, I too will get acquainted with our new way of life soon, but I hope soon comes rather quickly.

I have made many plans for myself to keep busy and made lists of things that I need to improve upon during the new found time I have to myself. One of my main goals is to get into a cleaning regiment to make the housework easier on myself. I even went out and bought refills for my daytimer so that I could prioritize my weekly housework schedule and make sure I do the daily duties that I list for myself each morning.

My second goal is to get back into shape and drop the rest of the weight that I have meaning to loose for the past couple of years. For several months I was on a roll, loosing weight and really feeling better about myself. Then something changed and I quit dieting and working out. Ever since I have felt like a big pile of flab, just utterly miserable...it's not a pleasant feeling. In the evenings after my housework is completed and Tristyn is napping or watching a video I am going to get my hiney on the treadmill and walk, walk, walk...walk until the pounds melt away. I'm just a few pounds shy of my pre-pregnancy weight (the plateau I have been at for several months now) and after I reach that first goal I am going to push to loose another 10, and then another 5, until I feel wonderfully about myself!

Although life is going to be tough over the next couple of months, weeks, or even years I am looking forward to making these few improvements in my life. I am looking forward to taking the time out from sitting on the couch to get the house in order and myself in shape. I just hope I can stay motivated long enough to get some of it done.

Cheers!